Well the last week has been quite the adventure. It didn’t all feel good, in fact I never felt such loss or panic and grief in quite a long time as in the last week. I also felt some of the highest highs, and warmest contentment.
I usually am very wordy in my description of events. Recalling all of this is too painful to write at the moment. It was almost the end.
In the end, my relationship with my GDG has always been honest and open. I can’t have it any other way. So far, we’ve accepted each other as we are, despite some differences that really pushed our limits. If the day ever came where GDG felt protecting my feelings to keep peace were to replace the open communication we have always agreed on, I would want her to let me go. To be clear THAT IS THE LAST THINK I WANT TO SEE HAPPEN! This is what drives me to push my limits.
But I think accepting someone as they are openly and honestly, is more important than lying to yourself or partner and being quietly disappointed. Life is full of disappointments. GDG never ceases to amaze me. At times makes me absolutely crazy from half a world away. I feel as if I’ve let her down, and that hurts me maybe as much as her.
Still, at the end of it all, we remained honest and bold, and came together. It was such an overwhelming calm to me. I could take on anything in the calm after the storm. I slept and functioned so much better the rest of the week. How can I care so deeply for someone I never physically met? Doesn’t matter. Only thing that matters is that we have each other. I think we both realize how much joy we bring to each other.
I think when couples are together for a while they get scared to be honest. They hide and protect feelings rather than being themselves. That is the beginning of the end. The day 2 people can’t be themselves and enjoy each other’s company is the day they should part ways. If one partner continues to grow, but the other will not change, it will hinder the other person from growing and cause bitterness and resentment. If you realize your partner is different, try and get to know them, for who they are today. See if they will open up. It could be a beautiful new beginning, or it could end years of misery.