I had to talk with wife. Text actually because kids are around and don’t want them in the middle. Actually, pretty one-sided thusfar, but pretty much as follows:
There seems to be no time to talk with the kids around. I let my wife know that I feel something has to change. I can’t go on like we’ve been living. Are the people we were in the first 20 years of our time together able to meet the needs of the next 20 years? I dont know. I do know we are both sorely missing a partner in life. We’re not young lovers, but we’re not that old either. If she feels like me, then she is probably tired of making an effort as well and feeling rejected. I told her I still love her. I didn’t know if I did anymore, but it still hurts being rejected, so I guess I do.
I just don’t know if I’m able to give her fulfillment, whatever that means to her. To me part is regular sex, but a much bigger part is actually feeling the person beside you cares about you, and wants to see you. I know I have not made her feel that way as often as I should, and apologized, for what it’s worth. I do not want to play the blame game. I just want to know if we have the energy or desire to fix our current situation. From my childhood, I know that 2 adults staying together for the kids is not always the best choice. Kids are not stupid. I want to be happy. I want her to be happy. Can we do that together? Time will tell.